Tag: adult humor
group name: offbeathumor
|
January 22, 2008 05:00 PM EST --
A new supermarket opened near my house and has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.
But I . . .
more
|
|
January 11, 2008 09:47 AM EST --
A couple, hosting a dinner party, were interrupted when the maid called the hostess to the kitchen.
"Ma'am, the cat climbed up on the kitchen counter and ate the middle of the salmon." . . .
more
|
|
January 22, 2008 06:11 PM EST --
Sam Clam and Ollie were life long friends; One day Ollie passed away and went to heaven.
After several months Ollie longed for his old pal Sam Clam. Becoming depressed he went to St. Pete and asked . . .
more
|
|
January 23, 2008 12:12 PM EST --
An old, tired-looking dog wandered into the yard. I could tell from his collar (though no tags) and well-fed belly and clean that he had a home.
He followed me into the house, down the hall, . . .
more
|
|
February 18, 2008 11:58 AM EST --
SAYINGS WE'D LIKE TO SEE ON THOSE OFFICE INSPIRATIONAL POSTERS
* Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* Doing a job RIGHT . . .
more
|
|
January 25, 2008 08:38 PM EST --
Guess who does not like his new step-parent...?
more
|
|
January 22, 2008 05:02 PM EST --
An 85-year-old couple, having been married almost 60 years, died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last 10 years, mainly due to the wife's interest in health food and exercise.
When . . .
more
|
|
January 27, 2008 01:08 PM EST --
These are good...!
more
|
|
February 08, 2008 01:39 PM EST --
This too good to keep to myself...max babi sent it to me...!
more
|
|
January 23, 2008 10:55 AM EST --
It was the day before a big presidential election primary, and hordes of candidates from both parties arrived to campaign. As environmentalism was identified as a major issue in the state, the candidates . . .
more
|
|
January 23, 2008 12:08 PM EST --
Four rabid football fans, a Giants fan, a Packers fan, a Chargers fan & a Patriots fan are climbing a mountain, and a onversation turned to an argument about which one loved his team more.
The . . .
more
|
|
January 23, 2008 05:28 PM EST --
THIS IS A NONPARTISAN JOKE THAT CAN BE ENJOYED BY BOTH PARTIES! NOT ONLY THAT. IT'S POLITICALLY CORRECT!!
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a . . .
more
|
|
January 24, 2008 04:35 PM EST --
Why Men Are Just Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. . . .
more
|
|
January 25, 2008 08:41 PM EST --
Too true.....!
more
|
|
February 18, 2008 11:16 AM EST --
Two blondes with hammers, Carol and Donna, were doing some carpenter work
on a Habitat for Humanity house. Carol, who was nailing down house siding, would
reach into her nail pouch, pull . . .
more
|
|
January 06, 2008 11:11 AM EST --
If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1000.
With WorldCom, you would have less than . . .
more
|
|
January 26, 2008 07:04 PM EST --
Aman was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard. Suddenly,the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stoppingat the crosswalk, even though he could have . . .
more
|
|
January 28, 2008 07:49 AM EST --
Are You Kathlick?
Three little Boys were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them. They decided it was because they had not been Baptized and didn't go . . .
more
|
|
January 24, 2008 09:40 AM EST --
A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peterat the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked,"What Are all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, . . .
more
|
|
February 07, 2008 03:01 PM EST --
A woman goes into Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.
. . .
more
|
|
|
|
